9 December 2013
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Kiki the One Day Dog
“I have something important I want to talk to you about,” Tawn said with a look of seriousness. “I think we should get a dog.” Trying to be a more effective communicator than usual, I decided to listen instead of immediately listing the dozens of reasons why getting a dog was a bad idea. So I settled back into the couch and tried very hard to have an open mind.
The end result of the discussion was that we ended up getting a dog. Despite my misgivings – we live in a no-pets condo, and a small one at that; our schedules don’t allow much time for a dog; while I love dogs I don’t want to be responsible for one – I told Tawn that if he could address the concerns that I felt, we could get a dog.
A week later, Tawn drove to a breeder across the river to pick up an 8-month old King Charles Cavalier. She had just been flown in from another breeder in Malaysia the night before and Tawn had been talking to the Thai breeder for a few weeks before asking me if we could get a dog.
I arrived home in the middle of the afternoon to find them in the bathroom: a sad, soaked pup shivering on the marble floor as Tawn tried to blow dry her hair. Even though she had never met me, she readily jumped into the relative safety of my arms. Her wet, floppy ears quickly soaked my shirt sleeves.
We sat on the patio for the next hour or so, the ceiling fan stirring a gentle breeze as I held the dog, whom we named Kiki, in a towel and tried to dry her fur. Her shaking stopped and she would doze for short intervals but quickly awoke at any movement or sound.
After a trip to the local pet store to buy some supplies for Kiki, Tawn had to head out for an event. I had some cooking to do in preparation for a dinner the next day. Kiki sat in her basket for a while and then in her kennel, watching me as I cooked. Even though she could see me, she would frequently bark, calling for my attention.
I would let her out and try to keep an eye on her as I cooked. Three times there were accidents on our carpet. Not being experienced caring for dogs, I quickly Googled for advice and tried to respond to the accidents without anger, instead carrying her to some newspapers on the patio whenever I though she might need to go.
Tawn returned home, excited at the prospect of a dog waiting for him. She still seemed a little timid, afraid perhaps that he would whip out the hair dryer once again. We put her in the kennel several times, leaving the room for an increasing length of time. She would yip and yelp quite quickly and we were worried that the neighbors would be disturbed by the noise.
Finally, when it was time for bed, I decided we should take some additional online advice: to help puppies adjust, place their kennel in the bedroom at night so they can sense that you are nearby. This seemed a reasonable step but about once every hour or so, Kiki would wake up and call for us. Finally, after the third time, Tawn took the kennel into the living room and stayed with her while I fell back asleep.
In the morning, I found him lying on the couch with Kiki in a basket nearby. With a voice filled with regret, Tawn told me that he had spent the night up with her. While doing so, he had evaluated his decision and said that he had probably miscalculated how much time and energy it would take to care for a new dog. He proposed that we call the breeder and return Kiki.
Again trying to be a good communicator, I listened, acknowledged his points, and let him know that I would support him either way. If he wanted to keep Kiki, we would find a way to make it work. If he wanted to return her, I would understand that, too.
In the end, we put Kiki in her basket and drove back to the breeder’s that morning. Kiki was subdued, probably from a combination of exhaustion and anxiety. Handing her back to the maid at the breeder’s house, I couldn’t hold back my tears.
The next day, the breeder posted a picture of Kiki (whose real name is something fancy like Lady Penelope) sleeping peacefully with her sister, along with a comment about how happy she seemed to be to be back at home. That helped reassure Tawn that we had made the right decision.
Looking back, I think it would have been possible to make Kiki a part of our lives. It would have taken a lot of work over several weeks, but it could have been done. But I also think that we made the best decision, because a dog (especially a lap dog) really requires time and attention. It isn’t fair to not be prepared to give them what they need to thrive.
Comments (18)
cute dog. I think you made the right choice, though understandably it wasn’t an easy decision once feelings were involved. I am glad that you got some nice pictures to help remember Kiki foar the short time she was yours. very nice indeed.
Thanks, I agree. Eventually, we may try again but right now, the pictures and the few memories are enough.
You handled it perfectly! It was Tawn’s decision and your support and understanding is an example to spouses everywhere! I’m sorry that you had to give her back but it was the right thing – for all the right reasons! Perhaps a less demanding pet – like a tortoise or fish…
Thanks for your kind words. It took all my effort to be supporting and understanding but I think the experience, as sad as it was, was a strengthening one for the relationship.
The decision to take her back to the breeder, was the right one….
With any type of dog, especially a puppy, it takes time to adjusting….You and Tawn to the puppy, and the puppy to you and Tawn….
And potty training would take weeks….
Now, if you really would like a pet…Parakeets or Canaries would make good pets, or even fish….
Since you have busy schedules,they would be fine….All you need to remember is feeding them, and watering them, and cleaning the cages….But fish is even better, just remember to feed them….
I think there was the “cuddle factor” that made the dog a particularly appealing choice! Ha ha… but, yes, some other pets might be better suited for our busy lives.
that is why hubby and I have 5 dogs and the part you kind of mentioned if our parenting skills are so different,
I do what is right for the dogs and they all love me but they are spoiled by hubby and not for the good.
One is blind now. The basset and he thinks she should be treated special and I just treat her like I always have and she’s fine.
My hubby argues and reasons with the dogs and I just clip on the lease and show them what I want from them by my behavior,
not sure if you have them long enough to find that out.
Well, only had Kiki for about 20 hours but definitely realized that she wasn’t open to reason and logic! =D
People often ask me why I don’t have a pet — I am away from home a lot, and have always felt it wouldn’t be fair to an animal to be left alone all the time.
That has been one of the things we’ve discussed a lot in the weeks since this puppy incident. We enjoy a certain lifestyle that allows us to travel, keep irregular schedules, etc. If we want a pet or even children, some of those things will have to be given up.
ps how could anyone not fall in love with those sad little eyes?
that is such a sweet faced baby!
maybe someday you when the time is right.
She definitely has those sad puppy eyes, huh?
You made the right decision and for the right reasons.
Awww… cute dog. You guys made the right decision.
Yeah, I couldn’t have that cuteness competing with me, right? =D
My husband and I have gone back and forth with getting a dog, too. As much as we both want one, it comes back down to the time and attention a dog needs, and this post was very realistic when it comes to having to deal with a puppy. Thanks for sharing. We are still looking, but would only consider an older, shelter dog that needs a good home and is more of a fit for us. PS. First time I’ve logged into Xanga 2.0…I miss this place! It’s lonely over there on WordPress.
You know, I have found a lot of familiar faces on WP and I quite like the wider range of options available there. But I’ll continue to blog here, too, since I paid for it.
kiki seems adorable. guess now i should stop imagining a chance of playing with her if i visit you and tawn. but yes, having a dog DOES require one to be a full time parent, much like having a real kid. i would not recommend you guys to have one, but only cause i’m considering your living situation. other than that, i think you guys would make loving parents.